Alien 2 On Earth (1980)

Did you know there was a sequel to Ridley Scott’s Alien that was made a year after Alien’s release? Surely, just because something isn’t ‘official’ doesn’t mean it’s not a sequel, right?

Fan fiction is legitimate writing, isn’t it? If that’s the case, I’m going to say that Alien 2 On Earth, aka Alien Terror, aka Alien 2 Sulla Terra is just as legitimate a sequel as Patrick Lives Again, and Zombi 2.

Alien 2 On Earth was written and directed (under instruction/ advisement of a Mario Bava) by Caro Ippolito under the pseudonym ‘Sam Cromwell’ and even though it’s not an actual sequel, and doesn’t look anything like Scott’s Alien, 20th Century Fox attempted to sue, but were stopped when it was shown that a book called Alien also existed.

The plot of the story is bizarre.

The world excitedly awaits the return to earth of some astronaut hits in their landing shuttle, but when it arrives, it’s found to be empty, just as weird blue rocks start to appear around the world.

Thelma Joyce (Belinda Mayne) is a spelunker who has a bizarre psychic seizure when being interviewed on a TV show about caves. The interview is cut short and she joins husband Roy (Mark Bodin) and the rest of her spelunking crew to go into some caves (filmed in the beautiful Castellana Grotte: a cave system in Italy).

On their way, one of the team Burt (Michele Saovi) finds one of the blue rocks and gives it to Thelma, knowing she loves geology, and of course for some strange reason, she takes it with her into the cave system.

Once down there, the rock starts to pulsate and a bizarre ‘thing’ comes out, attacking the crew, murdering them one by one in all manner of gory ways. Panicked, they lose their way in the caves but will any of them escape? And if that blue rock had that ‘thing’ in it, what of all the others above ground..?

Alien 2 On Earth is a silly as a film can be. It looks like an Irwin Allen science fiction TV series, has extreme gore that is actually quite indefinable, considering we never actually get to see the alien properly, and has bizarrely bad pacing with lingering shots of bowling alley ball returns that go on for so long that they are clearly there to stretch the time of the film. This all goes without commenting on how dismal the handheld camera work is; it’s so rocky at times that it makes The Blair Witch Project look like it was filmed on steadicam.

Sadly, and it is a reflection of my taste, I guess, I enjoyed watching every stupid minute, and this 88 Films Italian Collection release has treated it with far more respect than it possibly deserves.

An amusing story surround this film as it was originally supposed to be far more grand in scale, opening with the remains of the Nostromo from Alien crashing to earth (it must have traveled back in time) with the remains of the alien onboard, but legend has it that Ippolito spent a large proportion of the money raised for the film on an expensive car, escorts and casinos.

I really can’t express how stupid AND how much fun this film is. I’m almost embarrassed to like it.

Extras: The delightful folks at 88 Films have provided us with a handful of fun extras:

Special Effects Test is an interesting way to sit in silence for a few minutes whilst blank screens and blood and guts fill the screen. Would have been more interesting with some editing and maybe a commentary?

Franchised Terrorist: An Interview With Eli Roth, who is a big fan of 80s Italian horror and his enthusiasm for the film is visible, and he knows a lot about it! Interesting, but I would have preferred seeing someone who worked on the film chatting about it.

Alien 2 On Earth Trailer is exactly what it says on the box; the trailer for Alien 2 On Earth… but that’s not all, folks! We also have a trailer reel for other films like Creepshow 2, Invasion U.S.A., River of Death, Graduation Day, Sleepaway Camp 2: Unhappy Campers, Sleepaway Camp 3: Teenage Wasteland, The Couch Trip, Cuba, Messenger of Death and The Dead Next Door! Whew!

Film: 5/10

Extras: 6/10

Re-Watchability: 7/10

This 88 Films release was purchased from Amazon.