THE PURGE (2013)

THE PURGE (2013)

The Australian Bluray release of The Purge

Film: I always find it funny when you observe a piece of science fiction pop culture after the date that that sci-fi piece takes place. I still find it hilarious that the science fiction magazine 2000AD still calls itself that, but branding is a strong and important part of any pop culture, unfortunately, and it restricts creativity at its very source.

The Purge was written and directed by James DeMonaco, who wrote the screenplay for the remake of Assault on Precinct 13 in 2005, another film, like most thrillers in the vein of this, that sees people banding together in trapped environment against something trying to get inside.

Remember the Alamo, indeed!

Our plot involves James Sandin (Ethan Hawke) and his family, wife Mary (Lena Healey), daughter Zoey (Adelaide Kane) and son Charlie (Max Burkholder) on the most celebrated American night of the year, the night of The Purge. The Purge is one night a year where no crime will be punished for: murder, assault, robbery… it’s all on the cards and the police will do nothing about it.

Hawke and Headey

James loves the Purge as being a security contractor, he has made a lot of money from many people, including his own gated neighbourhood, by selling them state-of-the-art security systems.

The family are well prepared for the Purge except for two things that James does not expect. The first is 16 year old Zoey’s boyfriend, Henry (Tony Oller), an 18 year old young man who James doesn’t not approve of, has hidden himself within the house… for nefarious means on the night when no crime will be punished? Maybe.

The second issue is that Charlie observes a vagrant (Edwin Hodge) being chased through the streets by a gang led by an unnamed leader (Rhys Wakefield) who have decided to use the Purge to cleans the city of undesirables, and lets him into the house to save him as Charlie doesn’t believe the Purge is a good idea. The vagrant immediately disappears within the mansions walls.

The gang descends upon the the Sandin’s house

It’s an even worse idea when the gang descends upon the house with an ultimatum: give up the vagrant or the whole family pays the price.

As the Sandin’s are attacked from both inside and out, the question will be asked: who will survive the night?

The Purge is a violent sci-fi horror film released in 2013 that takes place in 2022… yep, three years prior to this review being written… and even though we thankfully have not reached the point where a yearly violent purge is how we sort out the world’s problems, I think the elements of society not being nice to itself for monetary reasons is sad.

There is some exciting things about this film that really thrilled me. One is that the people attacking the house and the vagrant have no character name. The fact that, like in real life, people move in and out of your life and do things to you and around you but remain nameless. That anonymity makes the story so much more terrifying; people having their lives assaulted for no reason other than a governmental edict.

There’s a great tale of the difference between the haves and the have-nots and just how even the haves feel like have-nots in comparison to successful people.

The masks are enormously effective.

This film certainly riffs on ideas presented in The Strangers from 2008 which borrowed a bit from the French films Ils aka Them from 2006. The difference is that those films had terrifying elements as there was no reason for the attacks, which is an awful thing to encounter. I think what makes The Purge worse is that citizens are being given permission to commit these assaults, which suggests a corrupt government that no longer works for the people.

The casting is excellent as well. Hawk and Headey make for a great couple, and honestly I love everything Headey does anyway so I may be prejudiced on that point. Kane and Burkholder are pretty good too, even though Kane feels like weebish eye-candy with her school uniform and Burkholder suffers a little of annoying child syndrome. The real heart of the piece though is Wakefield as the unnamed leader of the gang: self-important, self-justified, arrogant and with a mullet that lends legitimacy to the world worst haircut, he steals every scene he is in.

The story is deliberately told and has a great pace and the violence, even though you know it’s coming, is still surprising when it happens. I found the film a blast to watch and I look forward to getting stuck into the sequels which are going to be awesome, right?

Right?

The Bluray menu screen

Extras: Only one little pisspoor extra on this disc, which is a making of called ‘Surviving the Night: The Making of The Purge’. Its brief but does explain the origins of the story, but it’s mainly a fluff piece.

Hawke hacks a home invader

Film: 8/10

Extras: 2/10

Rewatchability: 8/10

This Bluray was purchased from JB Hifi

Imaginary (2024)

IMAGINARY (2024)

The cover to the Australia DVD release.

I think most people had an imaginary friend when they were children. I know I had one, though apparently mine was a different experience to most. I had my imaginary friend from the ages of 13 to 16, and instead of being an elf or a teddy bear, mine was a 27 year old blonde Bulgarian single mother of two with a voracious sexual appetite.

… but enough about me and teenage fantastical and onto the fantasies of writer and director of Imaginary, Jeff Wadlow, the director who also gave us the perfectly average but forgettable Truth or Dare from 2018 and a slasher from 2005 called cry_wolf, mostly forgotten except for the fact it starred Jon Bon Jovi as an educator.

It also had my then-horror movie crush Lindy Booth.

DeWanda Wise as Jessica

Imaginary starts with children’s author Jessica Barnes (DeWanda Wise) having a nightmare about a giant spider perusing her through a house, ironically in a scene similar to a children’s book she has written called Molly Millipede and the Blue Door.

She awakes with her partner, Max (Tom Payne) and they make the decision to move a few days early back to her childhood house, with his two daughters, Taylor (Taegan Burns) and Alice (Pyper Braun), the house now vacated after her father was admitted to an aged care facility.

Chauncey

Max’s life has had some tragedy as well as his former partner has been removed from society for some mental issues, including hurting the younger daughter.

Of course, being a new parent to the girls, Jessica has trouble connecting with teenage Taylor, who also won’t let her break down the walls with the her little sister, try though she might.

Soon after moving in, Alice and Jessica engage in a game of hide and seek, during which, Alice finds a teddy bear abandoned in a hidden room in the basement, which she quickly adopts.

Jess’s Dad, Ben (Samuel Salary)

Alice and the bear, who according to Alice calls himself ‘Chauncey’, become fast friends, as any child with a plush toy would, but very soon Chauncey gives Alice a list of things to do, a list of very specific things that have to be done… but why? What are these tasks in aid of… and why are some of them destructive, even self-destructive?

Unfortunately Imaginary is a great name for this film, as its entertainment value, its acting quality, its character’s likability… all imaginary. I love a film that has an imaginary friend cause some kind of terror to the family, even though each of these films has the same stuff in it like childhood trauma, a blended family, a new house, a young child who feels disenfranchised for what ever reason, and this film just sat down with a checklist and marked them off, one by one.

I will credit it with it taking the murderous demon/ ghost/ imaginary friend, and tweaking it a little to make the payoff somewhat different, though it does feel like it’s riffing a little on Steven King’s It, but because the rest of it is so mediocre, the payoff doesn’t feel like a reward, and instead feels just like a relief that it’s all over.

The menu to the DVD

Disc: Nothing

Film: 2/10

Extras: N/A

Re-Watchability: 0/10

Now THAT’s a spider.

This review was done with the Australian release DVD purchased from JB Hifi

MASTERS OF HORROR: IMPRINT (2006)

The cover to the Australian DVD

MASTERS OF HORROR: IMPRINT (2006)

In the early 2000s, an amazing TV series was produced called Masters of Horror, created by Mick Garris, where famous horror directors like Dario Argento, Don Coscarelli, Stuart Gordon, John Carpenter and others got to create short one hour horror movies, and Takashi Miike was one of the directors asked to participate.

Notoriety follows director Miike like a haunted shadow of a tortured ballerina whose sole purpose is to cut out his tongue and slice off his nipples. This, his ‘banned’ episode of Masters of Horror, sits well amongst his work. Like most of his movies, the story simmers, and is broughtslowly to a boil. With images of beautiful pain and exquisite suffering that stays with you for a time after the movie has finished.

Christopher (Billy Drago)

Based on a novel Bokke Kyote, by Shimaku Iwai (who also had a small role in the film), the screenplay for this film was written by Daisuke Tengan, who has worked with Miike before when he adapted the novel Audition by Ryu Murakami into the wonderful film of the same name.

Imprint tells the haunting tale from the 1800s of American journalist, Christopher (Billy Drago), who travels to an island in Japan in search of the prostitute, Komomo (Michie) who he had abandoned years earlier, promising to return for her. Finding himself unable to locate Komomo, he takes residence in a bordello, where he hires the services of a deformed hooker (Youki Kudoh), but instead of taking her for carnal pleasures, he asks her to tell him a story, and so, she recounts to him the fate of his beloved Komomo, and so begins a story of rape, torture and degradation…

Youki Kudoh as the story teller

Beautifully shot, Imprint at times is like watching a traditional Japanese painting come to life. The flame haired whores with their blackened teeth take on the appearance of oni or evil spirits, who live on islands and take much delight in the torture of others. Miike’s ability to take the obtusely sickening and turn it into an image of beauty is a gift that few directors have, but he has in spades.

Wow! Now THIS is torture porn!

The only real problem I found with this episode of Masters of Horror was Billy Drago’s performance, but I do not think that was his responsibility. Obviously, this film was to be part of an American television series, and the performances were to be executed in English, but as much trouble as some of the Japanese cast members had in performing in English; it seemed that the normally wonderful Drago was being misdirected, and appeared to be overacting. I imagine that this was due to miscommunication from the language barrier between Miike and Drago.

Everything Miike did right with the nightmare of Audition, he has done again here with Imprint. Both brutal and beautiful, Imprint is an experience not to be missed. The extras on this DVD make it a pretty easy sell as well.

The menu screen to the Australian DVD

Disc: There are 6 extras on this disc.

Imprint: I Am The Director of Love and Freedom Takashi Miike is a comprehensive interview with Miike, not just about this film, but about j-horror and its continuing influence in western cinema.

Imprint: Imperfect Beauty is one of the better spfx documentaries I have seen in a while.

Imprint: Imprinting is basically a ‘making of’ but an extraordinarily good one. This doco features interviews with many of the cast and crew including Nadia Vanessa, the dialogue coach who taught most of the actors how to play their parts phonetically, and is incredibly thorough and interesting.

There is a brief but fairly comprehensive biography of director Takashi Miike.

Commentary is by Chris D from American Cinematheque and Wyatt Doyle of NewTexture.com. While these two really had naught to do with this film, the talk-through is informative, and their discussion about the total influence of western to Asian and Asian to western cinema is enlightening and provides some independent insights into the production and decisions made about this film.

DVD-ROM – screensaver and script (Unreviewed as I have no longer have a PC with a disc drive in it)

The weird chicken lady… yeesh!

The DVD was purchased from Ezydvd.

BURNT OFFERINGS (1976)

BURNT OFFERINGS (1976)

The cover to Cinema Cults DVD release

Recently, my wife and I bought a house in the country. Quiet, secluded, peaceful and away from the city. We gave up our lives of hustle and bustle to enjoy the countryside, but being a horror fan comes with its disadvantages. All I could think of before the move was the ‘supernatural’ problems that can come with a new house, and in amongst thinking about all those film that enjoy a ‘new’ house as a core of its plot, the is film, 1976’s Burnt Offerings, kept coming to mind.

Now I’ll just clarify I wasn’t scared of moving to the new house, I was just reminded of it by the situation, and a yearning to watch it came to mind, especially after my more recent foray into ‘new home’ horror with Night Swim came about.

Burnt Offerings was directed by Dark Shadows creator, Dan Curtis, and it was co-written by him with William F. Nolan, the co-creator of Logan’s Run, and based on the book of the same name, published in 1973 by Robert Marasco.

The cover to Marasco’s 1973 novel

Burnt Offerings tells of the Rolf family, Ben (Oliver Reed), his wife Marian (Karen Black) and their 12 year old son David (Lee Montgomery), who, along with their Aunt Elizabeth (Bette Davis) have rented a summer house in the country off the Allardyce family for an almost incomprehensible low price for the entire summer.

Oliver Reed and Karen Black: Cinema Legends

The Allardyces, Roy (Eileen Heckart) and her brother Arnold (Burgess Meredith) have only one stipulation for the stay: The Rolfs must feed their mother, a recluse who has no desire to leave with the siblings on their respite, three times a day and maintain the property whilst they stay.

Another legend: Burgess Meredith

Soon, though, Ben starts to lose control and become violent and thuggish, as Marian becomes more and more obsessed with the house, but what is causing these behaviour changes, and what do they have to do with the horrible visions of the Chauffeur (Anthony James) that Ben is having… and does the house seeing to be repairing itself..?

There’s no doubt that Burnt Offerings is a classic film and that Dan Curtis’ style drips from every single frame.

… and another: Bette Davis

The cast are suitable amazing when you consider the legends that are within it. Heckart and Meredith are totally bizarre as the brother sister combination, and Davis plays the ostentatious Aunt as only SHE can. Black and Reed are a fantastic choice as the leads and even though they, on paper, probably shouldn’t work together; if I am honest, they feel like a couple who would have a bizarre sex dungeon, or buy waterproof fake fur to make chaps.

Or maybe I am projecting.

The story is fascinating and a slow burn horror, certainly of its time, that probably couldn’t be made today as there is not the amount of WHIZ and BANG to keep a modern audience interested for too long. If I am completely honest, I do feel the almost two hour run time could have a bit of a trim as even I found my mind wandering through some of the longer breaks from the mysteries of the house.

One interesting note is that when Curtis first read the book, he liked it but pitied any director who took on the job of directing any film that may have been made of it as he didn’t like the way the novel finished. Upon taking the job of directing on, he promptly changed the ending.

It is a gem of a film though and it absolutely is marked with Curtis’s style, from the soundtrack to the way the scenes are laid out. I’ve watched it several times and even though it isnt a favourite of mine, I must admit to a regular revisit, probably just due to the providence of the director and actors, but more likely because I, like many, have an obsession with Karen Black.

The Menu screen from the DVD

Disc: This DVD from the Cinema Cult isn’t the greatest as far as quality of image goes. I cannot say that I have seen a better image on a different release, but what I can say is that this is misty and slightly out of focus. This collection has two extras.

There is an audio commentary by Curtis, Black and Nolan which is lovely and conversation and fully discusses the film, with Nolan acting like a moderator more than someone who worked on the film at times.

There is also a theatrical trailer, which I have to say, is an absolute corker of a trailer!

The mysterious Chauffeur

THE OWNERS (2020)

The cover of the Australian release of The Owners

THE OWNERS (2020)

A lot of the time my interest in a film is based on the actors in it more than anything else. I’m not talking about blockbusters here either, sometimes it is those weird little films that slip under the radar that have character actors who wouldn’t necessarily appear in a film of that type.

This film, The Owners, provided me with the thrill of two TV actors that I would never in a million years would have ever suspected appear in a film together: Maisie Williams from Game of Thrones, and former Doctor Who from the 1980s, Sylvester McCoy. (Ok, I guess they were both in Doctor Who but their appearances were about 30 years apart)

The Owners was directed by Julius Berg, who also co-wrote the script with Mathieu Gompel and Geoff Cox, and was based on the graphic novel, Une Nuit de Plene Lune by Hermann Huppen and Yves H.

The graphic novel ‘Une Nuit de Pleine Lune’

The film takes place in the UK, where Mary (Williams) is frustrated as her boyfriend, Nathan (Ian Kenny) has not returned her car so she can get to work. She finds him with two of his mates, Terry (Andrew Ellis) and someone unknown to her, Gaz (Jake Curran) is her car, stoned, and casing the house of the town doctor, Richard Huggins (McCoy) and his wife, Ellen (Rita Tushingham)

Mary (Maisie Williams) and Nathan (Ian Kenny)

They have been observing the house for a while and have the inclination to rob it as Terry’s mother, Jean (Stacia Hicks) told him casually that there was a big safe in the basement.

The boys break in and find the safe, leaving Mary outside waiting in the car, only to find that its an old safe that they don’t have the tools to

open, so the only answer is to wait for the elderly Doctor to return.

Nathan (Ian Kenny) and Terry (Andrew Ellis) aren’t cracking it

Mary gets frustrated after waiting for a while and is coaxed inside by Nathan, only to be horrified by their intentions, and when the couple do arrive home, things go from bad to worse as the Huggins’, tied to chairs in the basement, refuse to open the safe door…

Mrs. and Dr. Huggins (Rita Tushingham and Sylvester McCoy

I remember seeing From Dusk Til Dawn for the first time and being stunned by the sudden gear shift from crime movie to vampire movie and whilst the gear shift isn’t as sudden, it is a breath of fresh air in a world of superhero sequels, Star Wars expansions and remakes. Sure it does riff on a few other films which i wont mention here as they will give the story away slightly, but the performances really sell it.

McCoy and Tushingham are delightful as the old couple, and remain endearing through the course of their performances no matter what they do; Tushingham in particular is amazing with her tragic dementia patient. Williams and Kenny play the couple whose relationship dissolves before our eyes really well and Ellis’ Terry is as frustrating a coward as ever.

The real villain of the piece is Curran’s Gaz, whose performance is straight out of an early Guy Ritchie flick and is more as more unlikable as his character is revealed. Its been a while since Ive seen a film where I’ve actively disliked a character and Curran really nails the wannabe hard man in this.

This was one of those pleasant surprises that really made me happy to have taken a $19 chance on a film I know nothing about except for some of the cast. Fantastic. Get on it.

The menu screen for the Australian DVD release

Disc: Surprising these days for a DVD in Australia, there actually is a couple of extras, even though its not much.

Behind the Scenes looks at the set up for some of the scenes in the film. It doesn’t go for very long and there isn’t any commentary on it but some of it is fascinating to see.

Interviews is a brief series of interviews with writer/ director Julius Berg, producers Alain De La Mata and Christopher Granier-Deferre, Maisie Williams, Sylvester McCoy, Rita Tushingham, Andrew Ellis, Jake Curran and Ian Kenny. Its just a fluff piece really but interesting to hear the cast and crews perspectives of the story.

If Gaz (Jake Curran) doesn’t quit dope, he might get hammered

Black Phone (2021)

Black Phone (2021)

The Australian Bluray release of The Black Phone

A few years ago, the film Sinister absolutely put me on my butt. It had been such a long time since I’d seen a horror film that actually felt like a horror story, and not just gore for gores sake, or that post-millennial ghost story trope that teens and regular cinema goers gravitate towards like The Conjuring or Insidious: you know, that easy, non-threatening ghostly rubbish made for mass market that is not much different from a movie from the Marvel or Star Wars universe.

That film came out in 2012 and there was a massively disappointing sequel released a few years later but to me with that first film, writer/ director Scott Derrickson parked his creative car firmly into the parking station of my brain. I admit I was excited at his employment as the director of the 2016 Doctor Strange film, being a fan of the character, and whilst I liked the film, I was disappointed by the casting of Benedict Cumberbatch as the lead, not because I don’t like him as an actor, but instead due to his horrible American accent.

The idea of Derrickson making a film based on a short story of Joe Hill’s, from his 20th Century Ghost compilation (also republished/ repackaged as The Black Phone And Other Stories to cash in on the film’s release) is a great one, and the expansion of that prose with the incorporation of his own upbringing in a violent neighbourhood in the 70s really rounds the tale off perfectly, with the juxtaposition of the violence of familial assault, bullying and a serial child murderer being so in line that I’m still not sure after several viewings, which was the worse situation.

Ethan Hawkes portrayal of The Grabber is quite disturbing

The Black Phone tells of a small town in Denver, Colorado that has become the hunting grounds of a serial child killer called ‘The Grabber’ (Ethan Hawke) by the local papers.

Several boys who go to the same school as Finney (Mason Thames) have already been taken, by the Grabber, including a tough kid who defended Him against the school bullies, and parents are on edge.

Mason Thames as Finney

Finney’s sister, Gwen (Madeline McGraw) has inherited her mother’s second sight, and much to her father’s (Jeremy Davies) dismay, has been talking to the police regarding one of the missing boys, and she continues to use it after Finney is inevitably taken.

Madeline McGraw as Gwen

After being attacked when stopping to help a children’s magician, Finney finds himself trapped in the basement owned by the magician, aka The Grabber. The basement is soundproofed, with just a single window, a bare bed, and strangely, a black phone hanging on the wall.

The black phone, of course, no longer works, but for some reason, Finney hears it ring, and when answered, he is visited by the voices of The Grabber’s previous victims, all of whom have advice on how to survive The Grabber’s advances… but will Finney be able to escape?

Derrickson has taken a very short story by Joe Hill and has expanded upon it using elements of his own childhood, growing up in Denver, Colorado. He mentions in the commentary that some parts of the script writing process felt like therapy. The incredible thing about the story is the upbringing is so violent, the bullying so intense and the parental beatings so brutal that when Finney gets taken by The Grabber, it feels like a release, and that before he was taken that the other kids have a subtle, nuanced jealousy of those no longer subject to the abuse.

This is a difficult thing to convey and not an idea you’d expect in a horror movies as it sounds more like a family drama film. The key to having this idea work was to have a cast capable of doing it, and even though Derrickson had many young actors in their roles, they were able to do so perfectly. Derrickson proves himself to very much be an actor’s director with how delicate those performances are.

The whole atmosphere is created with Derrickson’s choices in the presentation of the film. The soundtrack is provided by Mark Korven of The VVitch and The Lighthouse and when you consider Derrickson claims the pitch to him was ‘childhood trauma’, he absolutely hammered it home. These sounds in co-operation with the visuals which appear VHS-like at times, and in psychic visions have the grain of a Super 8, make for a film that has a Texas Chain Saw Massacre styled documentary or old news footage feel, which makes it all so much more effective.

The film was a wonderful example of modern horror filmmaking, and especially one done without a generic, so-called ‘true’ ghost story attached to it. I honestly can’t recommend seeing this film enough; it truly is a modern classic of horror movie storytelling. Do me one favourite please, Hollywood: you’ve made a wonderful, original film, please don’t consider remaking or sequelising this film.

Disc: This film was reviewed using the Australian Bluray release, which contains the following extras.

There are 2 deleted scenes which as usual, the film doesn’t suffer for them being absent.

There is a bunch of shorts that make up the next 4 extras that honestly, I suspect would have been far more interesting as a 40 minute ‘making of’ instead of a selection of shorts.

Ethan Hawke’s Evil Turn sees Hawke discuss what it takes to create an ‘evil’ character for a film, and then there is the usual ‘he’s so scary’ accompanying stuff. Hawke’s commentary about playing The Grabber is certainly interesting.

Beautifully shot and atmospheric, Derrickson’s film is a treat

Answering the Call: Behind the scenes of The Black Phone is a usual BTS styled thing, and it only goes for ten minutes, but still some of the sound bytes are interesting. There is a bit of circle-jerk offing as you would expect, but it still offers some insights to the making of the film.

Devil in the Design looks not just at the style of the Grabber and his basement cell, but also making it look like the 70s, and how it felt like it was real, and properly lived in.

Super 8 Set briefly discusses the use of Super 8 film to signify the dreams from the film, and how it’s appearance gives an unsettling feeling.

Shadowprowler – a Short Film by Scott Derrickson was filmed during lock down and stars, and is based upon an idea by his son Dashiell, with the music provided by his other son, Atticus, who also plays in the film. It’s a quirky little home-made horror film about home invasion made by a family who was bored whilst living in Kevin Sorbo’s house.

There is an amazing director’s commentary with Scott Derrickson which acts as both a discussion on the creation of his own film, and his own upbringing. Occasionally it almost seems like Derrickson is exorcising some ghosts from his own past, maybe he was, but the entire commentary is a must listen.

Never Back Down (2008)

The cover to the Australian DVD for Never Back Down

Never Back Down (2008)

Film: I’ve always loved the wrestling. Even after I discovered it wasn’t real I got sucked into the whole soap opera of the storyline’s, especially around the time of the Attitude Era, with the Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin and those guys. I did really love it, and even as an adult bought action figures and stuff, and then a friend of mine introduced me to the UFC.

I liked boxing and martial arts, and even went to those events at the 2000 Olympics in Sydney, but UFC took me by surprise. The brutality, the fitness, the strength, the determination… everything about it captured my attention; my love of violence in movies was possibly also tickled as well, and as Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) entered the vernacular, via its sports men and women entering movies and TV and other pop culture areas, I became enamoured.

This meant that very quickly we got to see movies based around the sport, and this film, Jeff Wadlow’s Never Back Down, a film that became a franchise is all about the MMA, and like films like The Karate Kid, it’s all about the new guy fitting in via the sweet art of beating people up.

Jake (Sean Faris) makes a bad decision in regards to dentistry

Jake (Sean Faris) has had to move to Orlando Florida with his family because his younger brother secured a position at an exclusive tennis school. It’s lucky though, because he has been getting into lots of trouble after the death of his father, and a particular nasty fight he had had during a football game is doing the rounds on the internet.

This piques the interest at everyone at his new school as there is an underground fight club, and very quickly, Jake is manipulated into fighting rich-kid douchebag but high-level buttkicker, Ryan (Cam Gigandet) by his girlfriend Baja (Amber Heard), where he is totally and utterly humiliated.

Jake decides to join a local gym run by Jean Roqua (Djimon Hounsou) after being introduced by his new friend Max (Evan Peters), who will teach him to fight as long as he promises to never fight outside of the environment.

This of course is impossible for the hot-headed Jake, who ends up at the wrong end of a few bits of biffo, but Jean continues to train him regardless, not knowing that his intention is to win The Beatdown, an underground fight competition held in a secret location, on the chance he might get to show his new skills to Ryan…

Ryan (Cam Gigandet) shows off his girlfriend Baja (Amber Heard)

Essentially what we have here is Fight Club without the discussion about mental health and the rejection of modern life. It’s more than that though, it’s also the same sport movie that you’ve seen 100 times before but there is a couple of things that make it stand out.

The first thing is Cam Gigandet. The best bad guys are the ones who do two things: they don’t know they are the bad guy and believe them to be the heroes of their own stories, usually due to having so many hangers-on and hot girls following them. The other is they have to be so douchebaggy that you don’t want to see them get their comeuppance, you NEED to see it, and Gigandet, a handsome rooster for sure, has such a punchable smart-arsey face that when it does eventually happen, the experience is almost divine.

It also stars the now-infamous Amber Heard, who was a cute and bubbly up-and-coming star who had previously been in All the Boys Love Manley Lane and Drop Dead Sexy. I had forgotten that it was her who played Baja, and I remembered liking her, and her role in this is certainly the Barbie-like love interest, but she does play it well. I’m gonna miss her not playing Mera in the next Aquaman movie because I liked her in that too.

The fighting choreography is also really good, and this version of the film on this DVD has, according to Wadlow, a remixing of the fight effects to make it more crunchy sounding. I do so love the sound of a breaking bone (on someone else) so I appreciated the effort.

This film does for MMA what The Fast and the Furious did for car culture: brought it kicking and scream into the world of mainstream. I want to say it’s awful, but as a teen sports movie that is more about the visuals than a deep story or a carefully constructed narrative, it’s not too bad.

Score: ***

The menu screen

Extras: There is a couple of interesting extras on this disc, especially the bit with MMA legend Bas Rutten. The disc opens with previews for the ‘comedy’ Semi Pro, Feel the Noise and Superhero Movie.

Commentary from director Jeff Wadlow, actor Sean Farris and writer Chris Hauty is not too bad. All three give interesting takes on what their perspective was of each scene.

Deleted Scenes with Introductions by Jeff Wadlow are a series of 11 deleted scenes that has Wadlow explain why they were removed from the film. Generally I think films are better without the scenes removed, when they aren’t just for gore or blood reasons, and as usual, some of these would have dragged the film down.

Mix It Up: Bringing MMA to the Big Screen looks at adapting a new modern sport into a new film franchise, and the training the actors went through to get into condition for the film.

How to Fight Like a Champ with Bas Rutten. Now Bas Rutten is an MMA legend, known as El Guapo (the Handsome One), Bas has an MMA record of 33 fights and 28 winds, and of those, 11 by KO and 14 by submission… simply, he’s a damned war machine. In this, he both discusses his sport, and comments on some of the fights from the film.

Score: ***

WISIA: I find the film strangely alluring and keep returning to it… much like the Fast and Furious films.

Jean (Djimon Hounshou) is moody about something over there

After.Life (2009)

After.Life (2009)

The cover to the Australian DVD release

Film: You just have to love it when a first time director knows how to use a hammer, and hits every nail right on its head, and here, with After.Life,  Agnieszka Wojtowicz-Vosloo does just that. The director is also the co-writer along with Paul Vosloo and Jakun Korolczuk and the three of them have crafted an amazing story with some spectacular set pieces and excellent performances from the cast: not bad for the first swing at the ball.

After.Life tells the tale of uptight school teacher Anne (Christina Ricci), who is in a relationship with lawyer Paul (Justin Long) that has its problems, that is, constant fighting, and in general she just seems completely disinterested. After an argument that starts as a misunderstanding, Anne jumps in her car and has a horrific car accident, where she is pronounced dead at the scene… until she wakes up on the slab at a mortuary.

Christina Ricci as Anne

Funeral Director Eliot Deacon (Liam Neeson) is attending to her body and explains to her that he has the ability to talk to the dead, in which he feels he helps the souls of the deceased transition from their living state to one otherwise. He explains to Anne that not everyone has the same ease in their transition, and he feels that she might be one who finds it complicated.

Anne is not thoroughly convinced, and feels as though she is still alive so it takes all Deacon’s patience to help her, and being her burial is a few days later, he is under a time constraint but Anne’s concerns that she is not actually dead, and instead a prisoner keep resurfacing, and after a time, may be not so unfounded…

Liam Neeson as Deacon

Wojtowicz-Vosloo’s directorial skills lie in two main areas: cast performance and scene setting. Every scene was lit and set like a painting and put together with the kind of meticulousness that would make Dario Argento sweat, and the cast all really were able to show their stuff. Ricci’s character’s fractured personality mixed with confusion made her initially unlikable but eventually you felt badly for her plight… I should probably point out for the pervy Ricci fans that there is a little bit of nudity in this film of her as well!!! Liam Neeson played his role like a less vaudevillian Vincent Price, and Justin Long actually acted for the first time in his life, and didn’t just seem like the Mac/ PC guy.

All in all, After.Life is a delicate film with some great performances and drips with a creepiness that could only be compared to an old guy in a raincoat on a schoolbus. I didn’t know anything about this movie going into it the first time I watched it, had forgotten all about it and have to admit to being totally impressed by it. The performances of all in this film were superb and the film will keep you guessing right to the end.

Score: ****

The menu screen to the Australian DVD

Extras: The disc opens with a few trailers for The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Crazies (remake) and The Collector and the only other extra is a trailer for After.Life itself.

Score: *

WISIA: This is a forgotten film that I only just remembered even existing and now I think it will enter my regular rewatch rotation.

Ricci ponders the difference between life and death

My Dear Killer aka Mio Caro Assassino (1972)

My Dear Killer aka Mio Caro Assassino (1972)

The cover to Shameless’ release of My Dear Killer

Film: This film opens with the greatest murder EVER put to celluloid. I kid you not: it has to be the MOST original murder weapon any killer has EVER used in a film, and I will have no argument.

The weapon of choice?

It takes a particular skill set to murder in this fashion

A bucket digger mounted on an earthmover (they call it a dredger in the film, but that is wrong) picks up a guy by his head and squeezes until it pops quicker than a zit in a teens bathroom. My reasoning for claiming its ‘best’ status is twofold: one, the inventiveness of the killer to think ‘Mmmm, opportunity is knocking, why not answer?’ when suddenly deciding to grab the victims head, and his/ her sheer chutzpah to actually use it… I mean, it is hardly stealth, kill-in-an-alley kind of a weapon!! Color me admirable!!

This film was directed by western/ Trinity Brothers director Tonino Valerii from a script by Roberto Leoni (Santa Sangre) and Franco Bucceri (Gli Esecutori), based on a story by them, along with Velerii himself and Django co-writer José Gutiérrez Maesso (which is nodded to in a scene where Django is played on a TV).

My Dear Killer tells of police investigator Luca Peretti (giallo regular George Hilton) who is assigned to a murder case when an insurance investigator has had his head removed in the aforementioned murder. As the layers of the murder unfold though, he finds himself caught up in an older investigation which involved the kidnap and death of a young girl. Of course as the investigation gets deeper, the bodies start piling up, but can Peretti figure out who the killer is with the unusual clues he has?

Giallo killers are always perverts too

As a fan of giallos I looked forward to seeing this, especially as its male lead was in other giallos such as The Strange Vice of Mrs Wardh and All The Colors of the Dark, and was much more than pleasantly surprised. Even though the story is quite detailed, it never becomes a victim of its own cleverness, nor does it becomes convoluted as some giallos do. The investigation goes from a to b without any longshot hunches that these films can sometimes contain.

There is some well played violence in the film as well, though somewhat silly at times (the killer sits and chats with one victim before searching her house, whilst she quizzically watches, for something to kill her with, and finds a circular saw!! This guy is clearly a disorganised serial killer to not have a weapon handy) and being an Italian film of its era, some stunningly gorgeous cast members.

I should also point out that this Shameless release is the first time it has been released uncut, which should add to the joy to those who like the bloodier side of things.

I think this film is a great giallo, and it is truly a shame that Valerii never made another as its direction is really solid. Also, it being a part of the Shameless collection, number 11 in fact,  gives it some collector swagger as well, with the spine of the amray making up the word ‘Shameless’.

Score: ****

The DVD menu screen

Extras: Not the greatest ever extras from Shameless on this disc. We have the trailer for the film, and a bunch of trailers of other Shameless releases, including What Have They Done To Your Daughters?, Night Train Murders, Torso (Carnal Violence), Baba Yaga: The Devil Witch, Ratman and The Black Cat.

Score: **

WISIA: Yes.

Strangled by the prices at the post office. Nothing’s changed.

This film was reviewed with the UK Shameless Screen Entertainment DVD release

The Legend of La Llorona (2022)

The Legend of La Llorona (2022)

The Australian DVD release of the film.

Film: In 2019, a sixth entry of The Conjuring series came out in cinemas, produced by James Wan, and starring Linda Cardellini, the woman who almost single-handedly turned Velma from Scooby Doo into the sexy nerd icon she is today whilst getting her glove on in the first Scooby Doo movie. Unfortunately, it wasn’t very well received and sits pretty low in most horror fans minds… even those that love the Conjuring as a series. Cardellini did, however, get nominated for ‘Most Frightened’ at the MTV Movie awards which she unfortunately didn’t win.

Surely I higher award doesn’t exist.

As one would expect, copycat films came out, usually direct to home video, and this is one of them. The Legend of La Llorona has an interesting pedigree, with the writing/ direction/ production team being responsible for such epic films as Alligator X, Sand Sharks and The Haunting of Whaley House. Surely this must mean poor acting, generic storytelling and credit fonts straight out of Microsoft Office.

Danny Trejo shares some amusing anecdotes…

Our tale is of the Candlewood family, Carly (Autumn Reeser), Andrew (Antonio Cupo) and their son, Danny (Nicolas Madrazo) who have taken a holiday to Mexico for a month in an attempt to get over the death of their baby.

They are taken to their villa by Jorge (Danny Trejo), a taxi driver who warns them that drug cartels are in control of the area, and to not stray too far from where they are staying.

At the villa they meet Veronica (Angelica Lara), who is disturbed that they have a son as Andrew did not mention they needed two rooms when they made the booking (I mean, what the hell? Have the writers NEVER booked a hotel?!?).

The distraught mother, played by Autumn Reeser

Of course, within minutes of arriving, Danny is attacked by what looks like a piece of floating toilet paper in a creek, but that’s not scary enough for his parents to leave him with Veronica, who they hadn’t met before today, while they go for dinner.

While at dinner, they run afoul of the local drug cartel boss, Pedro Pablo (Edgar Wuotto) and by the end of the night Danny has gone missing… but did the cartel kidnap him, or did the mysterious toilet paper, aka La Llorona, a ghost who steals children take him… more to the point, who actually cares?

There’s really no way to describe this film other than as an absolute piece of hot trash. Danny Trejo isn’t a bad actor, though he rarely has to stretch himself too far, but here he gets to lower his skill set to that of his accompanying cast.

Horror movies regularly use the whole ‘stranger in a strange land’ theme, but it really only works if the land isn’t filled with parodies of local that barely rise above that of a 1970s crime show. On several occasions I actually laughed out loud at the characters. The character with the name ‘Pedro Pablo’ was a particular high point of laffs: hopefully these filmmakers will get together and make an Italian based film starring a character named Michelangelo Linguini!

They even try to tap into other ‘spooky’ stuff by having some of the filming take place on that weird doll island, and by badly emulating Sam Raimi’s demon camera from Evil Dead!

Well, it might have been the acting, I can’t tell because they were both so bad.

Avoid.

Score: 0

The very empty menu screen to the film.

Extras: None. Thank goodness!

Score: 0

WISIA: Hell no: it’s a miserable piece of crap

Zamia Fandome a the spirit

This film was reviewed with the Australian DVD release