Girls Nite Out aka The Scaremaker (1982)

Girls Nite Out aka The Scaremaker (1982)

The cover to Arrow Video’s bluray release

When you watch a lot of horror… too much? No, never… but a LOT of horror, especially stuff from back in the 80s, when you get to my age, the memory gets fuzzy and you can’t quite remember if you have seen stuff or not.

Now I am sure I saw a cover of a VHS of The Scaremaker, and the villain of the piece looks VERY familiar, but I’m just not sure if I have ACTUALLY seen this or not. I don’t think I saw the VHS cover in person though, it may have been in a magazine or something.

This film was directed by Robert Duebel who other than some American Playhouse stuff, didn’t seem to stay in genre filmmaking which honestly, and I’m burying the lead here some what, is probably for the best.

Lynn (Julia Montgomery) looks on in amusement

Every year at Dewitt College (played by Upsala College in New Jersey which closed in 1995… probably out of embarrassment), the sorority houses engage in a scavenger hunt the night after the basketball team win their championship game, and this year is no different!

The girls are looking forward to a lot of fun, and our tale follows Lynn (Julia Montgomery), Dawn (Suzanne Barnes), Sheila (Lauren-Marie Taylor), Jane (Laura Summer) and Kathy (Carrick Glenn), amongst others on the hunt but what they don’t realise is that they are being stalked by a manic who is dressed in a modified version of the school mascot, a bear… with knives installed in its paws.

Who will survive? Is it gory? Is nudity involved? Will we be entertained?

Carrick Glenn: what happened to you?

Ok, so I won’t answer the first question for spoiler reasons, but the answer to the last three questions is n not really, no and probably not.

This film does have a bit of blood in it and the killers costume, whilst clunky, is a standout, though probably impractical. It’s does not have the 80s slasher trope of nudity, which is unusual, and made even more weird by the slutty behaviour of some of the characters: you know what I mean, those female characters who usually flash, put out and then become victims. Right or wrong is not what I’m judging here, I’m just saying it’s an odd trend buck for the period of slasher films.

The janitor is going to be disappointed with the state of the locker room

Now the Bluray does make reference to the multiple sources to make this ‘complete’ version but whether it was the filmmaking or Arrow Videos sources, I found the film to be FAR to dark and some points. I also have to say it took me several goes to get through the film as I found myself getting bored through it. Actually, I did have fun spotting actors from other films that didn’t go on to become big names, and I was constantly saying stuff like ‘that’s the guy from Creepshow 2!

Girls Nite Out is strange in that it feels like a slasher made for or by Christian Television; there is this weird ‘nice’ vibe about it. Now I understand that ‘nice’ isn’t an insult in general, but it is meant as one here. This film commits the biggest crime a film can make; it’s just boring.

At least it had Carrick Glenn in it who I loved in The Burning.

The Arrow Video Bluray menu screen

Extras: It’s Arrow Video so of course there is a fine bunch of extras on this disc.

Commentary by Justin Karswell and Amanda Reyes

Staying Alive is an interview with actress Julie Montgomery who played Lynn Conners. She talks about her acting and modelling history and is delightfully animated and really engaging. A great interview.

A Savage Mauling is an interview with Laura Summer who played Jane. More fun recollections of the making of the film.

Alone in the Dark is another interview, this time with Lois Robbin’s who played Leslie Peterson. As above, so below.

It Was A Party! is yet another interview but this time with Paul Christie, who played Dancer, still more recollections and career reviews.

Love & Death is yet ANOTHER interview but with Lauren-Marie Taylor and John Didrichson, who played Sheila and Ralph respectively.

These interviews were great but the absence of Carrick Glenn, my favourite of this film and of the film The Burning, was disappointing!

Archival Interview is another interview with Julie Montgomery but from several years ago. More of the same, really.

Alternate Title Card shows the beginning but with The Scaremaker title card instead.

Original trailers gives us both a Girls Nite Out and a The Scaremaker trailer. The Girls Nite Out trailer is a bizarre thing as it features someone not in the film, talking about being scared.

Film: 3/10

Extras: 8/10

Rewatchability: 1/10, unless like me you couldn’t get through it in one go.

The man versus bear debate was never more real

This Bluray was purchased from Metal Movies

HEART EYES (2025)

HEART EYES (2025)

The Australian Bluray cover to Heart Eyes

I’m a slasher guy.

I love all horror, if it’s done well, but specifically, I love slashers, mainly because I grew up with them, and I’ll include giallo films in amongst that because you know, they are technically slashers from Italy! (I know, I know, I’m being facetious)

I love me a good slasher franchise, and even better, I love it when a single slasher is stands out and really shows what can be done with the sub-genre: The Burning, Tenebrae and more recently, films like Freaky and Thanksgiving really make me take notice and I’m always really keen for a fresh one with original ideas…

… which of course leaves me open for lots of disappointment, and with that I’ll introduce you, and bury the lead on my opinion, to Heart Eyes.

This film was written by Phillip Murphy, Christopher Landon and Michael Kennedy, the last two who gave us the wonderful, and aforementioned, Freaky, and was directed by Josh Rubin,who directed Werewolves Within and Scare Me.

Olivia Holt as Ally

Heart Eyes tells of the serial killer known as the Heart Eyes Killer, or HEK, because of the awful mask they wear that has a night vision goggle set in the shapes of hearts, who travels from city to city, killing lovers every Valentine’s Day.

Our heroine, Ally (Olivia Holt) is concerned for her job at a beauty company because she did a Valentine’s Day campaign celebrating tragic lovers in the real that HEK comes to her city, and it’s not tracking well with her bosses. Enter handsome troubleshooter, Jay (Mason Gooding) with whom she has an immediate attraction to, which is reciprocated.

The potential franchise themselves, Heart Eyes

They go on a work dinner to attempt to work out what they can do but it would appear to everyone that the sexual tension is real… especially to HEK who thinks they are a couple, and actively pursues them, but when the attack fails, Jay ends up being accused of being the killer by cops Hobbs (Devon Sawa) and Shaw (Jordana Brewster)… yep, they are called Hobbs and Shaw…but what if it’s not Jay, and the killer descends on the police station to take out anyone who gets in their way….j

Unfortunately I don’t have much positive to say about this film. For starters, the Heart Eyes’ costume is just stupid, specifically the mask, and doesn’t read well in the confines of the film as it looks like a bad prop. Even down to a couple of times the lighting makes it look like it’s a movie prop instead of something that’s Freddy Krueger-Styled character may have fashioned in his workshop.

Another thing is the film consistently feels like an abandoned Scream franchise script, with so many plot point stolen… sorry ‘paid homage to’ in it. What doesn’t help this Diet Coke Scream is that the cast is littered with actors from the Scream franchise, making it seem even more desperate in its attempt to emulate its superior supposed source.

Wine press: not a great hiding place

This movie is clearly shot for the romcom vibes of a film by someone like Nora Efron but it doesn’t track well because the tension required in a horror film is completely absent so at no point is there an opportunity for the viewer to get scared, or even just get creeped out. Don’t get me wrong, there is some really great violence and gore gags, but the lead up to them doesn’t make them pay off as well as if they were films as a ‘proper’ horror movie.

What’s worse, and another part of the film that definitely doesn’t work, is a lot of the dialogue, from name checking romantic comedies (‘I’ve got to get back for My Best Friend’s Wedding’ – cringe!) and even blatantly attempting to rip off dialogue situations… not the actual dialogue… from films that are both more scary and much funnier, like Hot Fuzz.

Now I’d like to point out I don’t expect much if any originality in a slasher film, but i do think there are times where you should at least make an attempt to cover up the tracks you are leaving on the territory you are trespassing upon.

I will say that as a final girl I did like Olivia Holt, even though she was technically playing Kate Hudson in every romcom she’s ever been in rather than an actual final girl. I think if this had have been a film about a marketing genius screwing up an ad campaign whilst there was a serial killer on the loose, it had the potential of being a far better film… like a Devil Wears Prada mixed with Son of Sam where the killer is reference but not an actual part of the story.

I think that sometimes films are made not for the objective of making a film, but instead, are made to become a franchise for future financial benefits but I think filmmakers need to get away from this and return to just making good movies that MAY become franchises if they are successful.

It’s a nice dream. Let me have it.

Menu screen to the Australian Bluray cover

Extras: There is barely fifteen minutes of extras on this disc.

Murder and Meet Cutes: The Making of Heart Eyes which hilariously describes on several occasions how scary this film is going to be, all the while comparing it to Sleepless in Seattle.

Sigh.

Gag Reel – I’m sure the actors would fondly look back on these as fun and amusing days on set, but they all just feel like made-for-home-video- bull rap now. Unfunny and at less than 3 minutes, overlong.

Deleted Scenes – normally I agree with the omission of some scenes but I do believe there was a couple of opportunities here that

The Commentary with Josh Rubin is actually informative and fun. He seems to be a funny guy who loves the process of filmmaking. Shame this film is pretty average.

Film: 4/10

Extras: 5/10

Rewatchability: 2/10

We needed another slasher franchise like a hole in the head

This Bluray was purchased from JB Hifi

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2

The cover of the Australian Bluray release

The franchise that takes a licking and still keeps on ticking.

The Friday films are a massive part of my love of horror films. Probably the first non-Universal Monsters toy I ever bought would have been a Billikin vinyl model kit of Jason walking down stairs. It didn’t just change the type of model kits I make (I’m currently doing a kit of Betty Page undressing the Creature from the Black Lagoon costume) but it also stopped me from watching Universal and Hammer films, and turned me on to slashers, which in turn turned me onto my real true love, giallo films.

I wasn’t aware of the Friday films when they first came out, but I became a fan when I started hanging out at my local video shop in the early to mid-eighties, a place I eventually worked at, and started making my way through their horror section, and loved them, and have ever since.

Friday the 13th Part 2 is a surprise for two reasons. One, and if I need to place a spoiler alert for a Friday the 13th film, you may have discovered this site by accident, the killer from the first film is definitely dead… there is some extreme injuries the human body can come back from, but decapitation isn’t one of them. The second is the return of Jason, who was the motivation for his mother to kill all the teenagers, and was only seen as a child in a fantasy that Adrienne King’s Alice had after the trauma of seeing all her friends murdered and being pursued herself. This film takes place a short time later and for some reason our new killer, Jason himself, is a fully grown man, even though he died years ago.

Insert ‘what the hell’ emoji here.

I find it hilarious that EVERYONE who worked on the second film will say in various documentaries and extras about the film that they did t know how a sequel could be made. I think that that is hilarious that even the cast and crew shrugged their shoulders and went with it.

Friday the 13th Part 2 was written by Ron Kurz, who would also give us part 3 a year later and the Final Chapter soon after than, and was directed by Steve Miner whose list of directorial efforts are a mile long, but include both genre pieces like Friday the 13th Part 3 and House, but also episodes of The Wonder Years and Dawson’s Creek.

Everyone loves a little head, but not in the fridge

Friday the 13th Part 2 starts 2 months after the events of the first film with us revisiting Alice (Adrienne King) who is living alone and suffering with the PTSD (aka flashbacks to the previous film) of what happened to her, when she finds the head of Mrs. Voorhees in her fridge and is promptly dispatched by a very large man.

We flash forward five years later to the Packanack Lake Region Summer Camp Councillor Training Camp, near Camp Crystal Lake, run by Paul (John Furey) and his assistant/ partner Ginny (Amy Steel), and a bunch of youngsters all willing and eager to learn how to become camp councillors.

Any Steel (sigh) as Ginny

Paul tells the legend of Camp Crystal Lake, of Jason Voorhees, who drowned there and whose body went missing, and of his mother, Pamela Voorhees who killed a bunch of councillors for revenge against the kids who weren’t watching her son when he drowned, and how they believed Jason survived the drowning and lived in the wood like an animal… what? Ok, anyway…

One night, most of the councillors go into town for a bit of fun, but as the night wears on, those left behind start to get picked off by… something, or someONE!

For me it’s hard to get over the nonsensical mistreatment of the story, but I am prepared to climb over that obstacle to get to the rest of the Friday films which I do love as a whole, and it gave me my beloved Part V which is easily my favourite one. I think if there were more of an explanation of the story other than this massive suspension of disbelief I would like it more, but as a viewer you are just offered ‘the dead kid from the first film is back… we don’t know why, but deal with it.’ It’s one thing for a character like Michael Myers to get shot six times and fall off a balcony and survive but a zombie child stalking the woods for about 30 years and his mother who still grieved for him didn’t know about it seems unbelievable (even for horror) and assumes the viewer won’t care and will swallow anything… which we did, and still do.

There are things I do really like about this film, though. The first is the group of young people who are playing the camp councillors. I found them to be a little more real and less cartoony than the actor played the ones in the first film. I honestly can’t pinpoint exactly what it is but maybe it’s just that they are more likeable. I’m also still surprised to this day that they even has a really charming disabled character killed… when I first saw this film I assumed he would have survived! I think Amy Steel is a great final girl too, and a cinematic crush of mine as a teenager.

Friday the 13th Part 2: an equal opportunities employer

The other is the gore gags. They all look great and are inventive. Not only did they do things like double up on the human kebab, but also some of the other bits that made it next level: a blade to the face is one thing, but then a fall down theory odd steps just unlined the non-survivability of the situation.

It’s a Friday film: you know that you will get what’s on the box, and you will love it regardless of its issues. It’s also the start of the Jason era, so I can’t be too harsh on it.

The menu screen to the Australian Bluray release

Extras: As I said in my review for the original film, it’s hard to really judge extras on a F13 disc fairly anymore as the doco and book of Crystal Lake Memories collates all the stories and anecdotes together in one place.

Speaking of which…

Inside Crystal Lake Memories is an interview with Peter Bracke who wrote the Crystal Lake

Friday’s Legacy: Horror Conventions looks at horror fans at horror conventions. I’m not really a convention guy so this didn’t really mean anything to me at all. I write so I DON’T have to interact with others.

Lost Tales of Camp Blood Part 1is a short film that was also seen on the disc for the first Friday the 13th Bluray. I didn’t th*ni much of it then and I don’t think much of it now.

Jason Forever sees 4 of the actors who played Jason Voorhees come together to do a Q and A and a Fangoria convention.

Original theatrical trailer is what it says it is.

Film: 6/10

Extras: 5/10

Rewatchability: 10/10

Always listen to the local crazy!!

This Bluray was purchased from JB Hifi

TERRIFIER (2016)

The cover to Unbrella’s Bluray release

TERRIFIER (2016)

Film: Horror movie ‘franchises’ are made or broken on how charismatic or how visually striking their antagonist is.

The Freddys, the Jasons, the Michaels, the Ghostfaces all rely on those two points. The victims, the ‘final girl’, the story are all secondary to how appealing the bad guy superstar is! The caveat to that is recasting some don’t always work… sorry, Jackie Earle Haley, but I think you know it’s true.

Terrifier, with its new superstar antagonist, Art the Clown, came out of the blocks racing at full tilt. Suckling on the teat of coulrophibia and doubling down on it with a creepy mime costume, and acting choices, Art slipped it to a space in cinema where the old franchises, except for Scream, were missing in action, and perhaps too old to be revitalised effectively anyway.

Maybe Art is the first of a new generation, and we’ll start to see some REALLY screwed up stuff.

Not all clowns are funny, especially this work of Art

Terrifier, along with its two sequels (to date) were written and directed by Damien Leone, who created Art the Clown (he’s more of a mime but you get what I mean) for his earlier film, All Hallows Eve, an anthology film from 2013.

Terrifier tells of party girls Tara (Jenna Kanell) and Dawn (Catherine Corcoran)… are these Buffy references…who by sheer bad luck meet Art the Clown (David Howard Thornton) at a pizzeria they stop at on their way home from a Halloween party.

Tara (Kanell) calls for help

Art creeps them out by, well, just being a creepy guy in a clown costume, and is quickly kicked out after he defecates all over the walls of the restaurants bathroom, only to return after the young women leave to execute the two workers.

Tara and Dawn return to their car only to find a tyre slashed and call Tara’s sister, Victoria (Samantha Scaffidi) to come and pick them up as the spare was already in use.

Unfortunately for them, Art catches up with them before Victoria’s arrival, and then the gory night of terror REALLY begins.

Art is up at the crack of Dawn

I’m gonna start with the gore as it really is in your face and all looks practical. Leone a-pears to have come from a make up and special effects background and it’s generally good when those people end up directing as they can see how an effect can be done practically and not resort to substandard CGI. The only effects work I don’t really like was the make up on the nonsensical prologue that ties in with the ending.

On make up, Art the Clown is a terrifying looking thing. The actor is tall and lanky and knows how to manipulate his body so he looks like a combination of a preying mantis and Dhalsim from Street Fighter. His smile is an awful thing to behold also. Doug Jones would be impressed with his physical performance and his lanky, tendrilous body is a sight to behold.

The acting of the four females leads is pretty good, with Canell and Scaffidi being the highlights. The male characters just seem to act by seeing how loud they can yell at each other. Sure I get the script calls for that but at points it was borderline Kitchen Nightmares.

The locations are occasionally laughable as well. The morgue in the basement with what looks like Kaboodle kitchen cabinetry is laughable.

As for the script, well there isn’t really much story here: prologue, killer kills, kills again, and again, and then again, ending. As horror fans we shouldn’t expect more than that, especially from a smaller budgeted film, but the lack of depth was apparent. To Leone’s credit, he certainly is a horror fan judging by the tributes to other horror films thrown in here and there but this was gory over story every inch of the way, and if that’s want you want, something that doesn’t challenge you and just shows cool kills, you will probably dig this, but for me, I just needed a little more of a tale told.

I’m constantly criticising Hollywood for its lack of originality with its incessant need for remakes and sequels and stuff based on comics or books, and whilst I don’t think this is the cure, it’s a great start.

The Umbrella Bluray menu screen

Extras: There is a decent amount of extras on this disc:

‘All Hallow’s Eve’ the Anthology Prequel Film: it’s a great joy when a director’s earlier film is an added extra, it’s even better when that film features the same character from the feature you just watched and even better when it’s a full length film and not just a ten minute short. Winning all round!

Behind the Scenes featurette is a badly films pile of behind the scenes footage but at least they show the final film of some of the bits so you know what part of the film it came from.

Interview with Jenna Kanell sees ‘Tara’ talk about her experiences with the film and her history with Leone.

Deleted scenes shows two scenes that would have made little difference to the film at all.

Dread Central presents Terrifier San Diego Crowd Response is what you would expect: a bunch of people who loved the film… of course they did, why would you showcase the people who hated it. A bit onanistic as these things usually are.

Art the Clown Time Lapse Makeup – it does NOT look like a fun application, but it was fun to see the transformation: I wish there had been a talk through of what was being done.

Finally, trailers for Terrifier and All Hallows Eve.

Film: 5/10

Extras: 9/10

Rewatchability: 8/10

Guess who isn’t coming back for the sequel!

This Umbrella Bluray release was purchased from JB Hifi

Black Phone (2021)

Black Phone (2021)

The Australian Bluray release of The Black Phone

A few years ago, the film Sinister absolutely put me on my butt. It had been such a long time since I’d seen a horror film that actually felt like a horror story, and not just gore for gores sake, or that post-millennial ghost story trope that teens and regular cinema goers gravitate towards like The Conjuring or Insidious: you know, that easy, non-threatening ghostly rubbish made for mass market that is not much different from a movie from the Marvel or Star Wars universe.

That film came out in 2012 and there was a massively disappointing sequel released a few years later but to me with that first film, writer/ director Scott Derrickson parked his creative car firmly into the parking station of my brain. I admit I was excited at his employment as the director of the 2016 Doctor Strange film, being a fan of the character, and whilst I liked the film, I was disappointed by the casting of Benedict Cumberbatch as the lead, not because I don’t like him as an actor, but instead due to his horrible American accent.

The idea of Derrickson making a film based on a short story of Joe Hill’s, from his 20th Century Ghost compilation (also republished/ repackaged as The Black Phone And Other Stories to cash in on the film’s release) is a great one, and the expansion of that prose with the incorporation of his own upbringing in a violent neighbourhood in the 70s really rounds the tale off perfectly, with the juxtaposition of the violence of familial assault, bullying and a serial child murderer being so in line that I’m still not sure after several viewings, which was the worse situation.

Ethan Hawkes portrayal of The Grabber is quite disturbing

The Black Phone tells of a small town in Denver, Colorado that has become the hunting grounds of a serial child killer called ‘The Grabber’ (Ethan Hawke) by the local papers.

Several boys who go to the same school as Finney (Mason Thames) have already been taken, by the Grabber, including a tough kid who defended Him against the school bullies, and parents are on edge.

Mason Thames as Finney

Finney’s sister, Gwen (Madeline McGraw) has inherited her mother’s second sight, and much to her father’s (Jeremy Davies) dismay, has been talking to the police regarding one of the missing boys, and she continues to use it after Finney is inevitably taken.

Madeline McGraw as Gwen

After being attacked when stopping to help a children’s magician, Finney finds himself trapped in the basement owned by the magician, aka The Grabber. The basement is soundproofed, with just a single window, a bare bed, and strangely, a black phone hanging on the wall.

The black phone, of course, no longer works, but for some reason, Finney hears it ring, and when answered, he is visited by the voices of The Grabber’s previous victims, all of whom have advice on how to survive The Grabber’s advances… but will Finney be able to escape?

Derrickson has taken a very short story by Joe Hill and has expanded upon it using elements of his own childhood, growing up in Denver, Colorado. He mentions in the commentary that some parts of the script writing process felt like therapy. The incredible thing about the story is the upbringing is so violent, the bullying so intense and the parental beatings so brutal that when Finney gets taken by The Grabber, it feels like a release, and that before he was taken that the other kids have a subtle, nuanced jealousy of those no longer subject to the abuse.

This is a difficult thing to convey and not an idea you’d expect in a horror movies as it sounds more like a family drama film. The key to having this idea work was to have a cast capable of doing it, and even though Derrickson had many young actors in their roles, they were able to do so perfectly. Derrickson proves himself to very much be an actor’s director with how delicate those performances are.

The whole atmosphere is created with Derrickson’s choices in the presentation of the film. The soundtrack is provided by Mark Korven of The VVitch and The Lighthouse and when you consider Derrickson claims the pitch to him was ‘childhood trauma’, he absolutely hammered it home. These sounds in co-operation with the visuals which appear VHS-like at times, and in psychic visions have the grain of a Super 8, make for a film that has a Texas Chain Saw Massacre styled documentary or old news footage feel, which makes it all so much more effective.

The film was a wonderful example of modern horror filmmaking, and especially one done without a generic, so-called ‘true’ ghost story attached to it. I honestly can’t recommend seeing this film enough; it truly is a modern classic of horror movie storytelling. Do me one favourite please, Hollywood: you’ve made a wonderful, original film, please don’t consider remaking or sequelising this film.

Disc: This film was reviewed using the Australian Bluray release, which contains the following extras.

There are 2 deleted scenes which as usual, the film doesn’t suffer for them being absent.

There is a bunch of shorts that make up the next 4 extras that honestly, I suspect would have been far more interesting as a 40 minute ‘making of’ instead of a selection of shorts.

Ethan Hawke’s Evil Turn sees Hawke discuss what it takes to create an ‘evil’ character for a film, and then there is the usual ‘he’s so scary’ accompanying stuff. Hawke’s commentary about playing The Grabber is certainly interesting.

Beautifully shot and atmospheric, Derrickson’s film is a treat

Answering the Call: Behind the scenes of The Black Phone is a usual BTS styled thing, and it only goes for ten minutes, but still some of the sound bytes are interesting. There is a bit of circle-jerk offing as you would expect, but it still offers some insights to the making of the film.

Devil in the Design looks not just at the style of the Grabber and his basement cell, but also making it look like the 70s, and how it felt like it was real, and properly lived in.

Super 8 Set briefly discusses the use of Super 8 film to signify the dreams from the film, and how it’s appearance gives an unsettling feeling.

Shadowprowler – a Short Film by Scott Derrickson was filmed during lock down and stars, and is based upon an idea by his son Dashiell, with the music provided by his other son, Atticus, who also plays in the film. It’s a quirky little home-made horror film about home invasion made by a family who was bored whilst living in Kevin Sorbo’s house.

There is an amazing director’s commentary with Scott Derrickson which acts as both a discussion on the creation of his own film, and his own upbringing. Occasionally it almost seems like Derrickson is exorcising some ghosts from his own past, maybe he was, but the entire commentary is a must listen.

My Dear Killer aka Mio Caro Assassino (1972)

My Dear Killer aka Mio Caro Assassino (1972)

The cover to Shameless’ release of My Dear Killer

Film: This film opens with the greatest murder EVER put to celluloid. I kid you not: it has to be the MOST original murder weapon any killer has EVER used in a film, and I will have no argument.

The weapon of choice?

It takes a particular skill set to murder in this fashion

A bucket digger mounted on an earthmover (they call it a dredger in the film, but that is wrong) picks up a guy by his head and squeezes until it pops quicker than a zit in a teens bathroom. My reasoning for claiming its ‘best’ status is twofold: one, the inventiveness of the killer to think ‘Mmmm, opportunity is knocking, why not answer?’ when suddenly deciding to grab the victims head, and his/ her sheer chutzpah to actually use it… I mean, it is hardly stealth, kill-in-an-alley kind of a weapon!! Color me admirable!!

This film was directed by western/ Trinity Brothers director Tonino Valerii from a script by Roberto Leoni (Santa Sangre) and Franco Bucceri (Gli Esecutori), based on a story by them, along with Velerii himself and Django co-writer José Gutiérrez Maesso (which is nodded to in a scene where Django is played on a TV).

My Dear Killer tells of police investigator Luca Peretti (giallo regular George Hilton) who is assigned to a murder case when an insurance investigator has had his head removed in the aforementioned murder. As the layers of the murder unfold though, he finds himself caught up in an older investigation which involved the kidnap and death of a young girl. Of course as the investigation gets deeper, the bodies start piling up, but can Peretti figure out who the killer is with the unusual clues he has?

Giallo killers are always perverts too

As a fan of giallos I looked forward to seeing this, especially as its male lead was in other giallos such as The Strange Vice of Mrs Wardh and All The Colors of the Dark, and was much more than pleasantly surprised. Even though the story is quite detailed, it never becomes a victim of its own cleverness, nor does it becomes convoluted as some giallos do. The investigation goes from a to b without any longshot hunches that these films can sometimes contain.

There is some well played violence in the film as well, though somewhat silly at times (the killer sits and chats with one victim before searching her house, whilst she quizzically watches, for something to kill her with, and finds a circular saw!! This guy is clearly a disorganised serial killer to not have a weapon handy) and being an Italian film of its era, some stunningly gorgeous cast members.

I should also point out that this Shameless release is the first time it has been released uncut, which should add to the joy to those who like the bloodier side of things.

I think this film is a great giallo, and it is truly a shame that Valerii never made another as its direction is really solid. Also, it being a part of the Shameless collection, number 11 in fact,  gives it some collector swagger as well, with the spine of the amray making up the word ‘Shameless’.

Score: ****

The DVD menu screen

Extras: Not the greatest ever extras from Shameless on this disc. We have the trailer for the film, and a bunch of trailers of other Shameless releases, including What Have They Done To Your Daughters?, Night Train Murders, Torso (Carnal Violence), Baba Yaga: The Devil Witch, Ratman and The Black Cat.

Score: **

WISIA: Yes.

Strangled by the prices at the post office. Nothing’s changed.

This film was reviewed with the UK Shameless Screen Entertainment DVD release

Night Killer (1990)

Night Killer (1990)

The cover to Severin;s release of Night Killer

Film: By the time the 80s had ended, there was a big problem with horror movies. Very few big movies were made as that one shot scare film because studios wanted not quality cinema, but that dreaded word that is banded around in this world of Marvels and Star Warses: ‘the franchise’.

It was our fault! We fell so in love with the big characters of the time: Freddy, Michael, Jason, Norman, Leatherface and others that the problem was one WE created, and as expected, every studio, instead of trying to be trailblazers, decided to take the weaker path of least resistance and they all just tried to come up with another franchise character.

The want of a franchise wasn’t just an American thing either, it existed in some countries, like Italy, where they would occasionally just bash a film together, and then whack a sequel used title on it to market it as one of those franchises, and why not? If we, the movie watchers were silly enough to spend our hard-earned on it, why not live the motto ‘a fool and his money are easily parted’.

That manipulation of moviegoers has been going on for years, and the retitling of films to expand its release opportunities was rife all over, and for much longer than in the 80s, and this film, Night Killer, also known as Non Aprite Quella Porta 3, which means Don’t Open the Door 3, shows that even entering the 90s, it was still happening, especially considering that name suggested it was a part of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre series, called ’Don’t Open the Door’ there.

The plot clearly has nothing to do with the TCM series, as it’s tells of a masked killer (described erroneously in various online media as ‘a Freddy Krueger’ mask – it’s definitely not) who is killing women in the city, but one, Melanie (Tara Buckman) has survived and may be the secret to solving the case.

After the attack, of which she has no memory, she becomes self-destructive and wishes to commit suicide, but a total bullying douchebag of a man who tried to pick her up, Axel (Peter Hooten), witnesses her attempt and saves her, only to keep her imprisoned in his house himself.

Described everywhere as ‘ a Freddy mask’… have they SEEN Nightmare on Elm Street?

Meanwhile, the killer , full of bravado, continues his killing spree,but will Melanie’s memories come back and help with the investigation, and what is Axel’s secret… is he really what he appears to be?

The director, Claudio Fragrasso wanted to make a film that mixed the slasher and giallo sub genres of horror together but wanted it to be less a girl film and more a thriller. This, as is the old story, was not what the producers wanted so they hired Bruno Mattai to drop in some gore inserts and then instead of using Fragrasso title of Night Killer, they attempted to incorporate it into the TCM series, as I stated earlier.

The cops shakedown a scumbag motel owner

I don’t think the gore scene are out of sorts within the film though, what is a problem is the absolutely shocking performances by the leads. There is only seven cast listed and I imagine it might be because the rest were embarrassed to allow their name to be attached to it.

The plot is mostly nonsense, and I’m not saying that I necessarily thought that a slasher from the 90s was going to be a plot driven masterpiece, but this is a mess that feels like the writer wanted to do a film version of Steven King’s Misery/ Gerald’s Game in a fairly sub-standard giallo-esque film, all the while attempting some kind of psychological hoo-ha about guilt, suicide, amnesia and maybe even Stockholm Syndrome.

I mean, I’m no psychologist myself, but it all appears to be surface level, unresearched bollocks.

Amongst of all that it wasn’t such a bad watch. It probably says more about me than I want it to, but amongst the gore and the misogyny and even the bad acting and stupid mask, I can honestly see this becoming a part of my regular rotation, even though it does have an even dumber, Brian DePalma Carrie ending that should have been cast into the ‘ideas that are stupid’ bin.

Score: **1/2

The menu screen to the Severin Bluray release

Extras: Only three extras on this Severin release, and the titles of them all tell exactly what the contents of the extra are. The first two extras, The Virginia Claw Massacre – Interview with Director Claudio Fragrasso and Mindfuck – Interview with Screenwriter Rossella Drudi each discuss the various production and behind the scenes tales of the film.

There is also the trailer for the film.

Score: **1/2

WISIA: It’s just weirdly bizarre enough for me to watch it again. Yeah, it will get rewatched.

A little something for the beefcake fandom

Psycho Killer Card Game – The Expansions

Psycho Killer Card Game – The Expansions

The main game of Psycho Killer and it’s expansions

Several weeks ago, I did a review for a fun card game called “Psycho Killer’ from Escape Tabletop Games. The kind people from VR Distribution in Australia saw this review and kindly offered me a copy of each of the expansions to review.

If you wish to read that review, you can find it here: Psycho Killer Card Game – go back and read that first before embarking in this review.

The three expansions

In that original review, I do criticise the game for being packed in a far-too-big box for how small the game is, and when I saw how small these expansions are I assumed they would fit in the box with the original cards, which they do, but only if you remove the inserts that hold the original cards in place, or you can take these cards out and throw them in the box which would be a shame, because the audio cassette/ Walkman boxes are pretty cool.

Just on that: the boxes for these expansions ARE cool, but make no sense thematically. The original game, set around slasher films of the 80s come in a video tape, which is bang on for theme, but these seem to be more about the box art theme of the original rather than the game theme. Sure they all look cool together, but I just don’t get it.

The three expansions are called Gratuitous Violence, Z and Bloody Mary.

Psycho Killer: Gratuitous Violence

Gratuitous Violence is our first expansion, and it adds a much more combative experience. There are 15 cards in this little tiny box, all marked with a ‘V’ so if you want to play the game WITHOUT these cards, they are easily removed.

First, it adds a Psycho Creature to the pile, if you draw this guy, you don’t just drop all your weapons, you also take one from each other player… yikes! Save Yourself allows you to force another player to draw your last card instead of you. Creepy Local let’s you try to steal a particular card from another players hand. I Know What You’ll Do Next Summer let’s you look at rearrange the top three cards so you can pick who gets what for the next three hands, and finally, three ranged weapons (Flame Thrower, Crossbow and Hunting Rifle (not pictured)) which have the unique ability of the player holding them being able to put them on another players weapon pile to increase THEIR score.

An example of the cards from Gratuitous Violence

As you can see, these cards add a really nasty, attack-other-players element to the game, and the word “BAST-AAAAAAAAARD” will be exclaimed often. Also, the addition of the extra cards means that the player count can be increased to 7, so you can make even more people angry!

Score: ****

Psycho Killer: Z

Z is the next expansion, and adds a zombie apocalypse to the threat of a Psycho Killer. Again, this card adds enough cards to the deck so you can increase the player count to 7, but whereas Gratuitous Violence was all about attaching other players, this is all about you as an individual.

This expansion is all about getting infected by a zombie virus, and then trying to get rid of it to another player. The weapon cards in this expansion are all zombie attacks (Bite, Scratch and Swarm) but they don’t get played when a Psycho Killer attacks, but instead they get played when you draw an Infected card, and you will keep playing those cards as long as you are infected.

Some of the cards from Z

You can get rid of the card though, with either a The Cure card, in which you shuffle it back into the deck (keeping your wounds), a Supply Run card, were the player takes one card from every players hand (maybe they’ll take that infected card) and the Patient Zero Psycho Killer card, where you distribute your cards to the other players. There is also a Shallow Grave card, which can be swapped with the top card on the discard pile; got an Infected card? Swap it with a played The Cure, if you are lucky!

This expansion is hilariously self-destructive, but the zombie injury cards are affected by the Band Aids and Stitches cards from the main game, also cards like Let’s Split, Drop Your Keys and Disarm can also be a way to rid yourself of the Infected card.

Score: ****

The box for Psycho Killer: Bloody Mary

Bloody Mary is the final expansion, and it turns Psycho Killer into a drinking game! The first thing one must do to play this game as a drinking game, is to remove all the Psycho Killers and Weapons cards from the base game, and replace them with the Bloody Mary cards, and the Drink cards. The scoring is still the same, except when someone gets a Bloody Mary card, everyone has to take as many sips of their drink as the points on the card say. For example, if you got a Bloody Mary (+3 points) and placed a Beer card with it (+1), you would take 4 sips of your drink.

This game also adds ‘Character Cards’ to the mix as well. While you have a character card in your hand, you must take on the persona of that card. For example, if you have The Bartender in your hand, it’s your job to keeps everyone’s drinks filled, The Final Girl stops you from taking a drink, and The Jock allows you to pick a member of your frat, and they have to drink whenever you drink. These character cards make for an interesting experiment in the game, and even cards like Play Dead allows you to keep a character card should the opportunity come up where a character is to be removed, which is whenever a Bloody Mary is played.

A sample of cards from Bloody Mary

There’s also other drink-oriented cards like Pass Out Under the Bed, where instead of drawing a card to end your turn, you take a drink, and Splatter, where everyone must keep drinking their drink until they finish theirs, or you finish yours!

I’d like to point out at this point of the review, that the To Watch Pile encourages everyone to drink responsibly, look out for your buddies and please, don’t drink and drive.

This box also has a bunch of blank cards do you can create your own Psycho Killers: maybe your deck needs a Cropsy (drink a flaming sambuca), or a Madman Mars (you have to spend 5 minutes awkwardly in a spa with another person while terrible music plays), or even a Norman Bates (player wears a wig and impersonates their mother until the next Psycho Killer is drawn).

I have to make the points on this one a bit lower than the others for two reasons. One, the re-jiggery-pokery of the deck on setup is never a fun way to start a game, though the makers of the game have labelled all the cards with a little Bloody Mary so they are easily removed. The other issue is that it narrows the game to drinkers only, so under-18s are immediately left out as are non-drinkers. I think games are better when they appeal to a wider audience, and this narrows it. Don’t get me wrong, the actual mechanics of the drinking in this expansion are fun, but a non-drinker in your board game club isn’t going to get anything out of it. Also, it’s a shame the character cards weren’t in other expansions with non-alcohol related things for them to do, like maybe a ‘Lovers’ card who divide damage equally or something like that.

Score: **

These expansions all have a recommended retail of about $19.95, and I think the Gratuitous Violence and Z boxes are certainly worth it, even though the contents of the box don’t seem to be much. They do add fun extra elements of gameplay with a small amount of components. The Bloody Mary expansion I probably wouldn’t worry too much about, but I do like that you can make your own Psycho Killers! People whose board game nights turn into orgies of liquor might enjoy it.

I’d just like to offer a thank you to the people at VR Distribution for allowing me an opportunity to review their product.

Psycho Killer Card Game

Psycho Killer

The amazing box for Psycho Killer

David Byrne from Talking Heads once said;’ Psycho Killer, qu’est-ce que c’est, fafafafa fafafafafa better, run, run, run, run run away.’ It doesn’t mean anything in regards to this card game review, but he did say it… on SEVERAL occasions!!

There’s nothing I love more than a tidy little card game that is easy to learn, and the teach can be taught in minutes. The reason I like this is that it’s nice for my wife to have a card game or two in her hand bag, and when at the pub, it can be whipped out for a quick few rounds.

Unfortunately Psycho Killer from Escape Tabletop Games doesn’t come in one of those little boxes, but to their credit, they have put the base game into a box that will eventually fit the expansions if you choose to buy them, and I guess if you want to, you can just throw the original deck into a smaller box for travel. Also, and I have to point this out before I go any further, the box is in an awesome replica of a VHS tape, which is very thematic for the game. It just proves that even though I think I’m nostalgia proof, I definitely am not!

(NB: the expansions to date are a zombie expansion, another called Gratuitous Violence and a drinking game addition called ‘Bloody Mary’.)

If one of these comes out of the deck, you’re all in trouble.

The game does fit that previous criteria though, as the short instructions take minutes to read, and the play explanation takes even less, so if you do decide to whip it out and introduce it to people who haven’t played it before, you’ll be up to your guts in no time. This game is a clear example of it not being the size that counts, but what you do with it instead.

In Psycho Killer, you play potential and eventual victims of a slasher who wants you dead. The winner is determined by who has the less injuries at the end of the game, which is determined by when the fifth psycho killer card is drawn from the draw pile.

The regular cards

Play is simple. To set up, take the cards with black backgrounds (these are the psycho killer and bad event cards) out of the deck and deal 7 cards to each player. Shuffle those black cards back into the deck and place that deck as a draw pile in the middle of the table.

Each turn, players play as many cards as they can from their hand, and finish their turn by drawing a card from the top of the deck to replenish their hand. If the card is a psycho killer card, they, and everyone else at the table have to play all their Injury cards, which determines how many points they have, and after the 5th psycho killer is drawn, the person with the lowest amount of injuries, wins!

Simple right? The curliness of the game comes from the fact that the other cards you play can see you moving your injuries to other players, checking the cards in the deck to see if you can avoid them, reversing the state of play and other such devious things that help you avoid injury. There is also a catch up mechanism too: if you have more than 10 injury points during the game, you are ‘left for dead’ and it gives you an advantage of being able to hold some of the black cards (not the psycho killer) in your hand until it’s strategically better for you to play.

I really like the theme of the game, and the fact that the design of it all fits well in with the VHS generation, and there is plenty of horror in-jokes or Easter eggs or whatever they are called these days for the big horror fan, and even the minor one. The good thing is that the theme doesn’t disturb the gameplay so if you aren’t a horror or movie fan, like my wife, it doesn’t get in the way of a fun game. I guess this also means the theme isn’t important, but I admit I did purchase this game because of it.

A game of Psycho Killer in progress

If I am to criticise this game for one thing, it’s the ‘when to play’ code on the cards. Thematically, using the emblems for ‘fast forward’, ‘play’, ‘eject’ etc to describe when each card has to be played is smart, but it’s not immediately accessible, and those casuals who aren’t big movie fans will ask on several occasions what it means, so be prepared for those questions!

All in all, Psycho Killer is a quick fun family game with a very non-family theme. Game length is random as you never know when those psycho killer cards are going to pop up, but the cards make it tactically fun as you cross and double cross your friends and family, allowing them to get more injuries than what you have, aiming towards that lower score at the end.

Score: ****

Scream (2022)

Scream (2022)

The cover to the Australian 4K release.

Film: The older I get… and let me tell you, I’m getting older REAL fast… the more and more sick I am of the word ‘franchise’. When I was younger, it referred to a McDonalds, or a KFC, now it appears that no filmmaker or writer wants to make a movie, they want to make a franchise.

You know, I get it. To create something that has some kind of cool legacy would be amazing. To know that something you created has a future because it has a love that is generationally significant.

In past times you could do it with just a single film, which might indicate the quality of these franchises over single films of the past. Personally I blame my beloved 80s movies, and the post-2000 need for nostalgia driven product over new stuff. I guess I’m part of the problem when you consider that this very website older movies more often than newer ones.

Scream (2020) starts with the assault of Tara Carpenter (Jenna Ortega) in her house by the returning Woodsboro murder icon Ghostface, which causes he estranged sister Samantha (Melissa Barrera) to return home as their mother is missing with one of her many boyfriends.

Samantha has a terrible secret!

What we quickly learn is that Sam is the illegitimate daughter of the original Woodsboro murderer Billy Loomis (Skeet Ulrich), and is in therapy as the idea of her father being a serial killer has caused a few mental issues.

Of course, the killer is back, but this time is killing the children and/ or family members of the original victims/ killers, and one by one, people are being murdered who somehow relate back to the original murders

This alerts Sydney Prescott (Neve Campbell) and Gale Weathers (Courtney Cox) to the situation, and make there way back to the town to help in whatever way they can, but could it have been that the villain(s) of the piece wanted exactly that?

Sydney and Gale don’t have ANY secrets!

Like other Scream movies, the story is pretty silly and far fetched, and relies characters to behave in a way that real people don’t. That’s just movies I guess. One thing is, though, is the need justify its existence via a dialogue-based meta-explanation that talks about the state of franchised cinema, and also references itself in a matter more mastubatory that wanking to a home video of yourself wanking. Even down to mentioning how stupid and frustrating new horror films naming themselves like they are the original is unfunny and doesn’t shows a sense of irony: it shows the writers off knowing what they are doing, why they are doing it and are still big enough jerks to make us spend the rest of our lives saying ‘no not that one, the original one’.

As usual with the Scream films, after the first one that is, the motivation for the murder(s) is somewhat lacking, and if not for the quality of acting and violence, would have been flat and uninteresting.

I do have to say I liked the cast, no matter how unliveable the character was. The acting is on point and the cast are certainly a lot more convincing that previous entries. Some of the throwbacks to previous episodes, like Randy’s sister played by Heather Matarazzo from Scream 3, Marley Shelton from Scream 5, Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox and David Arquette from the entire series are an obvious addition. By the way, Arquette has turned into a super-cool ex-cop action hero type, and I want to see him in something like the Bob Odenkirk movie Nobody.

I did find one thing deliciously wonderful about it: considering it’s pedigree of PG-rated, more teen friendly violence, this has some moments of brutality that are stunningly surprising. Some slow, penetrating stab shots that take no prisoners and a leg/ ankle snap that made some parts of me shrink so much I’m gonna need a hot bath to set them free from cowering in my lower abdomen.

Are we gonna see another one? It feels like it, for sure. Do we need another one, no: not even slightly.

Score: ***

The menu from the 4K release

Extras: The extras on this disc are quite interesting, and really do pay tribute to Craven’s creation (even one of the characters names is Wes).

There is a Commentary by writers James Vanderbilt and Gus Busick, directors Tyler Gillett and Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and executive producer Chad Villella which is great, as it really covers a lot of aspects of the film, though their assumption of an asthma inhaler in the first scene was ‘very very subtle’ makes me wonder if they have ever seen a movie before. Come on guys, if someone is asthmatic or diabetic it DEFINITELY a plot point later in the film.

The Deleted Scenes are worthless and the film is better off without them.

New Blood compares the original film with the new film, and they talk about how important the film is in film history. Let’s face it, the original film probably did save the dire place mainstream horror was in at the time.

Bloodlines is the same as above but with the cast.

In The Shadow of the Master looks at Craven’s history and influence on the horror genre.

Scream 1996 (see, what did I tell you) trailer.

Score: ***

WISIA: If I was to watch an entire franchise again, I probably would, but I wouldn’t watch it as a single one-off film again.

Wes cops it.